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Saturday, March 08, 2008
It's a BREAKUP not a BREAKDOWN - Lisa Steadman
Preface/Introduction
By the time all was said and done, I was a big fat screaming mess. I cried myself to sleep every night. Actually, I cried when I woke up in the morning, cried when I took a shower, cried on my way to work, cried in the bathroom at work, cried to my girlfriends on the phone, cried on the way home from work, cried on my couch at night, and then cried myself to sleep.
Today you may be feeling empowered and healthy about your breakup. Or you may be filled with doubt, despair, and confusion Don't worry, during your post-breakup recovery you'll most likely feel like you're on an emotional roller coaster. You'll go back and forth many times between the two extremes before you fully move on. Just ride it out, trust that you will get through this and become stronger for doing so. Your heart may feel like it's been shattered into a trillion tiny pieces, but it's still there. Still beating. It still loves you, and still believes in love. (Just need a little time to heal first.)
Breakup Rule #1.
You cannot sleep with your ex. I know how tempting it is to fall back into the arms of your ex. There's momentary comfort there.
Breaup Rule #2.
Avoid any contact with him at all, including calling, texting, emailing, checking his MySpace page, IM, driving by his house, showing up at his work, or leaving notes in his car. You cannot move on if you're still holding on.
EX ETTIQUETE
It's not possible to stay friends with an ex while still moving on. Because as hard as it is to accept, the relationship is over. It ended for a reason. Most who try to stay friends with their ex are just doing so in hopes of either rekindling or using the person as a crutch til someone better comes along.
Breakup Rule #3.
Do NOT save phone messages from your ex and replay them over and over again. That's self-destructive and will only hurt your ability to let go and move on.
There are plenty of available men who would love to call you. It's up to you to clear the way for them, and that means letting go of your ex, giving yourself time to heal, and then making space for someone new in your life.
And if you were hoping to keep tabs on your ex by tracking his every online move or possible new dating adventures via MySpace page? Don't. It'll just make you wonder who he's talking to (or obsess about those girls who keep posting messages to him), and you don't need that. Remove his page from your favourites and look for a new friend or two to take his place.
CHAP 2.
The Emotional Rollercoaster
There may be moments when you feel manic elation about your sudden freedom from a relationship that just wasn't working anymore. You may be prone to fits of laughter followed by a torrent of tears. Moments later, you might experience strong surges of panic, isolation, loneliness, and despair. Don't worry, you're not crazy, just post-breakup.
Why your ex isn't worth pining over
- He's not right for you.
- Someone else is out there, and you're free to look for him.
- You deserve to feel loved and wanted.
- He's probably not pining over you (harsh, but probably true)
Erase "If only" from your vocabulary.
It's only natural for us to look back on our relationship and wonder if there's anything we could have done differently.
Chap 3.
www.breakupchronicles.com
www.womensavers.com
www.breakupnews.com
www.dontdatehimgirl.com
Assess your Fabulous Factor
Write down 10 magnificent things about you. This is to remind you of your fabulous factor whenever you're in doubt.
And write down a list of things to do.
Chap 4.
If you still harbor feelings for your ex or you have moments when you miss him, you're perfectly normal.
Write down the things you're not gonna miss about. Eg. his mood swings? money problems? Take a good look and remember why it's good he's gone.
Reasons why you might not want to let go.
You still Love him
Plain and simple, you're still in love with your ex. The good news is you'll definitely find love again, with the right guy, your heart will be in good hands.
You're not sure it's really over
You tend to linger too long at the breakup scene. This only leads to more questions. The best thing to do is accept that not all your questions will be answered and move on anyway.
Worried no one else will come along
Pessimists tend to settle for less than they deserve because they haven't fully discovered their own magnificence. They gravitate toward relationships with people they think can help or make them happy. but the only person is actually yourself.
MOVING ON
- I will never give my heart to anyone who is undeserving of it.
- I will pay attention to relationship red flags as they are revealed to me and act accordingly.
- When I'm ready, I trust myself to exercise excellent judgment in selecting a suitable candidate to fall in love with (one who is capable of loving me on the same level!)
- I trust myself to date and be open to the possibilities.
- I am healthy and strong enough to endure dating disappointments along the way, and I will be able to differentiate those from the actual heartbreak.
- I will not let any baggage from the past affect my future relationships.
- I dedicate myself to wholeheartedly to living and loving my life as it is right now (fixing the things that no longer work and love my life even more) ¶ 6:58 PM 1 Comments
Preface/Introduction
By the time all was said and done, I was a big fat screaming mess. I cried myself to sleep every night. Actually, I cried when I woke up in the morning, cried when I took a shower, cried on my way to work, cried in the bathroom at work, cried to my girlfriends on the phone, cried on the way home from work, cried on my couch at night, and then cried myself to sleep.
Today you may be feeling empowered and healthy about your breakup. Or you may be filled with doubt, despair, and confusion Don't worry, during your post-breakup recovery you'll most likely feel like you're on an emotional roller coaster. You'll go back and forth many times between the two extremes before you fully move on. Just ride it out, trust that you will get through this and become stronger for doing so. Your heart may feel like it's been shattered into a trillion tiny pieces, but it's still there. Still beating. It still loves you, and still believes in love. (Just need a little time to heal first.)
Breakup Rule #1.
You cannot sleep with your ex. I know how tempting it is to fall back into the arms of your ex. There's momentary comfort there.
Breaup Rule #2.
Avoid any contact with him at all, including calling, texting, emailing, checking his MySpace page, IM, driving by his house, showing up at his work, or leaving notes in his car. You cannot move on if you're still holding on.
EX ETTIQUETE
It's not possible to stay friends with an ex while still moving on. Because as hard as it is to accept, the relationship is over. It ended for a reason. Most who try to stay friends with their ex are just doing so in hopes of either rekindling or using the person as a crutch til someone better comes along.
Breakup Rule #3.
Do NOT save phone messages from your ex and replay them over and over again. That's self-destructive and will only hurt your ability to let go and move on.
There are plenty of available men who would love to call you. It's up to you to clear the way for them, and that means letting go of your ex, giving yourself time to heal, and then making space for someone new in your life.
And if you were hoping to keep tabs on your ex by tracking his every online move or possible new dating adventures via MySpace page? Don't. It'll just make you wonder who he's talking to (or obsess about those girls who keep posting messages to him), and you don't need that. Remove his page from your favourites and look for a new friend or two to take his place.
CHAP 2.
The Emotional Rollercoaster
There may be moments when you feel manic elation about your sudden freedom from a relationship that just wasn't working anymore. You may be prone to fits of laughter followed by a torrent of tears. Moments later, you might experience strong surges of panic, isolation, loneliness, and despair. Don't worry, you're not crazy, just post-breakup.
Why your ex isn't worth pining over
- He's not right for you.
- Someone else is out there, and you're free to look for him.
- You deserve to feel loved and wanted.
- He's probably not pining over you (harsh, but probably true)
Erase "If only" from your vocabulary.
It's only natural for us to look back on our relationship and wonder if there's anything we could have done differently.
Chap 3.
www.breakupchronicles.com
www.womensavers.com
www.breakupnews.com
www.dontdatehimgirl.com
Assess your Fabulous Factor
Write down 10 magnificent things about you. This is to remind you of your fabulous factor whenever you're in doubt.
And write down a list of things to do.
Chap 4.
If you still harbor feelings for your ex or you have moments when you miss him, you're perfectly normal.
Write down the things you're not gonna miss about. Eg. his mood swings? money problems? Take a good look and remember why it's good he's gone.
Reasons why you might not want to let go.
You still Love him
Plain and simple, you're still in love with your ex. The good news is you'll definitely find love again, with the right guy, your heart will be in good hands.
You're not sure it's really over
You tend to linger too long at the breakup scene. This only leads to more questions. The best thing to do is accept that not all your questions will be answered and move on anyway.
Worried no one else will come along
Pessimists tend to settle for less than they deserve because they haven't fully discovered their own magnificence. They gravitate toward relationships with people they think can help or make them happy. but the only person is actually yourself.
MOVING ON
- I will never give my heart to anyone who is undeserving of it.
- I will pay attention to relationship red flags as they are revealed to me and act accordingly.
- When I'm ready, I trust myself to exercise excellent judgment in selecting a suitable candidate to fall in love with (one who is capable of loving me on the same level!)
- I trust myself to date and be open to the possibilities.
- I am healthy and strong enough to endure dating disappointments along the way, and I will be able to differentiate those from the actual heartbreak.
- I will not let any baggage from the past affect my future relationships.
- I dedicate myself to wholeheartedly to living and loving my life as it is right now (fixing the things that no longer work and love my life even more) ¶ 6:58 PM 1 Comments
Saturday, February 23, 2008
The guy who loves you
The guy who loves you, if he can't always see you, he will try to make himself busy, so that he will not miss you, because he knew, if he didn't, he will keep on missing you until he could do nothing.
The guy who loves you, can't tell you the reason why he loves you. He only knew that, in his eyes, you are the only one.
The guy who loves you, seldom praises you, but in his heart, you are the best, only he knows it.
The guy who loves you, will scold or complain if you didn't reply his message but others don't because he cares.
The guy who loves you, only drop his tears in front of you, when you try to wipe his tears, you are touching his heart, the heart which beats for you.
The guy who loves you, will remember every word you said, even if its a casual remark.
and he will use the word always at the nick of time.
The guy who loves you, will not give any promise that easily, because he don't want to break the promise, he want you to believe him and he want to give you the happiest and safest life ever after.
The guy who loves you, always tell you not to think too much, because he has already planned it for you, he wants to give u the best life in the future,
he wants to give you a suprise, believe him that he can do it.
The guy who loves you, will go to the airport to fetch you.But he won't carry a bunch a rose and call you darling like what you expect him to do so. but he will carry your luggage and ask you, " why are you becoming that thin within two days?" with his sincere heart.
The guy who loves you, will listen quietly to you, when you are mad.
and when you cooled down, he will say, "you still got class tomorrow, sleep early," with a smile.
The guy who loves you, don't know that whether he should call you when you are angry, but he will send a message to you after few hours, if you asked him why he call that late, he will say, "when you are angry, my explanation are all rubbish. IT is when u have calmed down,
then my explanation will only really works."
The guy who loves you, always call you little girl, but everytime he want to make a big decision, he will first want to hear your advice.
The guy who loves you, don't like little toys like teddy bear, but he will always put the bear you gave him on his bed.
The guy who loves you, while quarelling,
he will apologize uncontrollably, although you are the one who's wrong,
and later, he will send a message to you with "baby, actually you know its your fault,
you know it yourself."
The guy who loves you, while really missing
you, will want to buy a bunch of rose and wait for
you stupidly under your apartment .
but he never knows,
what he bought is daisy,
but it doesn't matter,
because in his heart, those are roses.
The guy who loves you, can't tell you the reason why he loves you. He only knew that, in his eyes, you are the only one.
The guy who loves you, seldom praises you, but in his heart, you are the best, only he knows it.
The guy who loves you, will scold or complain if you didn't reply his message but others don't because he cares.
The guy who loves you, only drop his tears in front of you, when you try to wipe his tears, you are touching his heart, the heart which beats for you.
The guy who loves you, will remember every word you said, even if its a casual remark.
and he will use the word always at the nick of time.
The guy who loves you, will not give any promise that easily, because he don't want to break the promise, he want you to believe him and he want to give you the happiest and safest life ever after.
The guy who loves you, always tell you not to think too much, because he has already planned it for you, he wants to give u the best life in the future,
he wants to give you a suprise, believe him that he can do it.
The guy who loves you, will go to the airport to fetch you.But he won't carry a bunch a rose and call you darling like what you expect him to do so. but he will carry your luggage and ask you, " why are you becoming that thin within two days?" with his sincere heart.
The guy who loves you, will listen quietly to you, when you are mad.
and when you cooled down, he will say, "you still got class tomorrow, sleep early," with a smile.
The guy who loves you, don't know that whether he should call you when you are angry, but he will send a message to you after few hours, if you asked him why he call that late, he will say, "when you are angry, my explanation are all rubbish. IT is when u have calmed down,
then my explanation will only really works."
The guy who loves you, always call you little girl, but everytime he want to make a big decision, he will first want to hear your advice.
The guy who loves you, don't like little toys like teddy bear, but he will always put the bear you gave him on his bed.
The guy who loves you, while quarelling,
he will apologize uncontrollably, although you are the one who's wrong,
and later, he will send a message to you with "baby, actually you know its your fault,
you know it yourself."
The guy who loves you, while really missing
you, will want to buy a bunch of rose and wait for
you stupidly under your apartment .
but he never knows,
what he bought is daisy,
but it doesn't matter,
because in his heart, those are roses.
Labels: bgr
¶ 7:10 AM 0 Comments
Thursday, November 01, 2007
A True boyfriend
When she walks away from you mad
[ Follow her ]
When she stares at your mouth
[ smile...then kiss her ]
When she pushes you or hit's you
[ hug her tight ]
When she starts cursing at you
[ say i love you ]
When she's quiet
[ hold her hand and ask what's wrong ]
When she ignores you
[ act cute so she'll notice you ]
When she pulls away
[ Pull her back ]
When you see her at her worst
[ tell her you love her and she still
looks amazing ]
When you see her start crying
[hold her...ask her what's wrong]
When you see her walking
[ approach her..give a kiss on the
cheek. ]
When she's scared
[assure her you're not goin to leave
her ]
When she lays her head on your
shoulder
[ tilt your head too..and hold her
hand ]
When she steals your favorite hat
[ let her keep it]
When she teases you
[ Tease her back and make her laugh ]
When she doesnt answer for a long time
[ reassure her that everything is
okay ]
When she looks at you with doubt
[ Back yourself up ]
When she says that she likes you
[ she really does more than you could
understand ]
When she grabs at your hands
[ Hold hers and play with her
fingers ]
When she bumps into you
[ bump into her back and make her
laugh ]
When she tells you a secret
[ keep it safe and untold ]
When she looks at you in your eyes
[ dont look away until she does ]
When she misses you
[ she's hurting inside ]
When you break her heart
[ the pain never really goes away ]
When she says its over
[ she still wants you to be hers ]
When she posts this bulletin
[ she wants you to read it ]
- Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her
because 10 yrs later she'll remember you:
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
- Tease her and let her tease you back.
- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.
- Give her the world.
- Let her wear your clothes.
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.
- Let her know she's important.
- Kiss her in the pouring rain.
- When she runs up at you crying, the
first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"
[ Follow her ]
When she stares at your mouth
[ smile...then kiss her ]
When she pushes you or hit's you
[ hug her tight ]
When she starts cursing at you
[ say i love you ]
When she's quiet
[ hold her hand and ask what's wrong ]
When she ignores you
[ act cute so she'll notice you ]
When she pulls away
[ Pull her back ]
When you see her at her worst
[ tell her you love her and she still
looks amazing ]
When you see her start crying
[hold her...ask her what's wrong]
When you see her walking
[ approach her..give a kiss on the
cheek. ]
When she's scared
[assure her you're not goin to leave
her ]
When she lays her head on your
shoulder
[ tilt your head too..and hold her
hand ]
When she steals your favorite hat
[ let her keep it]
When she teases you
[ Tease her back and make her laugh ]
When she doesnt answer for a long time
[ reassure her that everything is
okay ]
When she looks at you with doubt
[ Back yourself up ]
When she says that she likes you
[ she really does more than you could
understand ]
When she grabs at your hands
[ Hold hers and play with her
fingers ]
When she bumps into you
[ bump into her back and make her
laugh ]
When she tells you a secret
[ keep it safe and untold ]
When she looks at you in your eyes
[ dont look away until she does ]
When she misses you
[ she's hurting inside ]
When you break her heart
[ the pain never really goes away ]
When she says its over
[ she still wants you to be hers ]
When she posts this bulletin
[ she wants you to read it ]
- Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.
- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go
- When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her
because 10 yrs later she'll remember you:
- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her
- Call her before you sleep and after you wake up
- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.
- Tease her and let her tease you back.
- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.
- Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think its stupid.
- Give her the world.
- Let her wear your clothes.
- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.
- Let her know she's important.
- Kiss her in the pouring rain.
- When she runs up at you crying, the
first thing you say is;
"Who's ass am I kicking babe?"
Labels: bgr
¶ 1:44 AM 0 Comments
Saturday, April 14, 2007
How Guys express their Love
When a GUY is quiet and is
alone,
He's is thinking how good you're, Miss
you!!!
When a GUY is lying on his bed,
He is thinking deeply why he loves you.
When a GUY looks at you in your eyes,
He wants to tell you how much he loves
you and
how important you're.
When a GUY answers "I'm Fine" after
awhile,
He is not and feels hurts.
When a GUY keep asking you the same
question,
He is wondering why you are lying.
When a GUY hugs you while sleeping,
He is wishing that you belongs to him
forever.
When a GUY calls you everyday,
He Miss You and wants your attention.
When a GUY wants to see you everyday,
He cares for you and want to know how
are you
today.
When a GUY sms's u everyday,
He wants you to know he is fine.
When a GUY says I love you,
He really
means it.
When a GUY says that he can't live
without you,
He has made up his mind that you are his
future
wife.
When a GUY says "I Miss You",
He wants to see you immeditely.
alone,
He's is thinking how good you're, Miss
you!!!
When a GUY is lying on his bed,
He is thinking deeply why he loves you.
When a GUY looks at you in your eyes,
He wants to tell you how much he loves
you and
how important you're.
When a GUY answers "I'm Fine" after
awhile,
He is not and feels hurts.
When a GUY keep asking you the same
question,
He is wondering why you are lying.
When a GUY hugs you while sleeping,
He is wishing that you belongs to him
forever.
When a GUY calls you everyday,
He Miss You and wants your attention.
When a GUY wants to see you everyday,
He cares for you and want to know how
are you
today.
When a GUY sms's u everyday,
He wants you to know he is fine.
When a GUY says I love you,
He really
means it.
When a GUY says that he can't live
without you,
He has made up his mind that you are his
future
wife.
When a GUY says "I Miss You",
He wants to see you immeditely.
Labels: bgr
¶ 6:30 AM 0 Comments
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Find a guy who...
Find a guy, who calls you beautiful instead of hot.
Who calls you back when you hang up on him.
Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead.
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
Who holds your hand in front of his friends.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."
Who calls you back when you hang up on him.
Who will stay awake just to watch you sleep.
Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead.
Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats.
Who holds your hand in front of his friends.
Wait for the one who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you.
Wait for the one who turns to his friends and says, "...that's her."
Labels: bgr
¶ 5:36 AM 0 Comments
