Friend I love you because...
with you I can be myself
Because we can talk about anything and laugh about silly things...

I love you because...
You made a difference in my life and that made all the difference.

I love you for a hundred thousand reasons~
But most of all I love you 'cause you're you!

Dear friend:
Thanks for giving me enough space to be a close friend.
Thanks for giving me your smile to wear when tears had washed mine away.
Thanks for admiring my virtues and accepting my flaws when I wasn’t capable of doing either.
Thanks for poking me with your laughter when I was full of hot air.
Thanks for making me laugh when something happened to me that was nothing to laugh at.
Thanks for asking me what I was going through and reminding me that soon I would be through it.
Thanks for listening to what I said and couldn’t say, and understanding that what we can’t say hurts the most.
Thanks for all the time we spent together and for showing me that friendship can be our finest hour.
Thanks for the lesson in self-esteem: All friendship first begins with self-friendship.
Thanks for opening your heart: When a friendship opens, it opens us inside out.
Thanks for teaching me not to be blind to friendship even if you sometimes have to close one eye to make a friend and two eyes to keep a friend.
Thanks for telling me when I have something stuck in my teeth.
Thanks for having the honesty to not accept my faults as yours.
Thanks for listening to me when I had nothing to say and for saying nothing about you.
Thanks for reminding me that who I once was is not as exciting to you as whom I might yet become.
Thanks for remind me that a friend is someone who is there for you when you don’t think you’re getting anywhere.
Thanks for reminding me that the only way to be a best friend is to be the best I can be.
Thanks for listening long enough for me to hear how wrong I could be.
Thanks for reminding me that we can be independent and still depend on others.
Thanks for taking my side in arguments and changing sides when I changed my mind.
Thanks for reminding me that I’m not the most important person in the world but that you think the world of me.
Friendship is contagious and love is contagious.
Friendship is like good health; you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.
Friendship is a key that can unlock something inside of us we never knew was locked.
A friend is more than someone who treats us with the same familiar disregard we have for ourselves.
A friend is someone who allows distance but is never far away.
If we look at our friends and feel lucky, we are.
Growing up, lots of people would talk to me. You would listen.

Don’t take criticism to heart but to get to the heart of the criticism.
Real kindness is helping someone who can never repay you.
We are lost when we don’t help others to find their way.
No matter how gifted we are, none of us are a gift to others if we’re wrapped up in ourselves.
When you want to wash away a memory, scrub with time.
The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference.
God gave us two eyes so we could see both sides of our own opinions, and two ears so we could hear both sides to the argument, but only one mouth and the reminder not to talk out of both sides of it.
It is all right to be wrong and wrong to always be right.

Labels: relationships

  ¶ 8:14 PM 0 Comments

  Exercise Face

The Neck Tightener

To help relieve and prevent a double chin, sit upright, head back, looking at the ceiling with your lips closed, and start a chewing motion. You will the muscles working in your neck and throat area. Repeat 20 times.

The Furrow Smoother

For pesky forehead wrinkles, lift your eyebrows as high as possible, opening your eyes very wide. Relax and repeat 10 times. Then let your fingertips meet in the centre of your forehead and gently lift up the forehead skin while lowering your eyebrows. At the same time draw your finger across the forehead towards the hairline. Repeat 10 times.

The Lip Plumper

Sit upright, keeping your lips closed and teeth together. Smile as widely as you can without opening your lips. Hold for a count of five and when relaxing start puckering your lips in a pointed kiss. Keep it there for a count of five and relax. Repeat 10 times.

The Cheek Shaper

Smile with your lips closed and then suck in your cheeks towards and onto your teeth. Hold this for 10 counts and repeat 10 times.

The Chin Firmer

Raise your chin up and put your lower lip over your toplip. Place your fingers just above your jawbone. Now smile. You will feel a lift in your neck, jaw, mouth and lower cheeks. Hold for 10 counts and release. Repeat 10 times.

The Eye Debagger

Sit upright with eyes closed and relaxed. Keeping them closed, lift your eyebrows and stretch your eyelids down as far as possible. Hold this position for a count of five. Repeat 5 times.

To gently tone the muscles of the eyes, press your two index fingers on each side of your head at the temples while opening and closing your eyes quickly. Repeat 5 times.

Tips:

1. Mouth the letters “I”, “E”, “U”, “X”. Ham it up, exaggerating the pronunciation of each letter so that you feel your muscles really working.
2. To make your fragrance last, apply a body lotion first. It creates a foundation on which your scent can linger.

Signs you’re sleep deprived

- You regularly remember your dreams. This indicates that you are waking up the before the final sleep cycle- the one where you get the most mind clearing sleep.

- Irritable

According to the British Sleep Foundation, for the average person, who needs eight hours’ sleep a night, losing even one hour can lower the IQ by one point the next day. This may not sound a lot, but add it up over a week and low-grade absent-mindedness can soon set it in.

IN SEARCH of a GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP

1. Peel a banana. High in the amino-acid tryptophan, it helps to promote sleep.
2. Stay away from stimulants for three hours before sleep. Bacon, cheese, chocolate, red win and horror films.
3. Plan your next day early in the evening so you won’t worry while trying to sleep.

Labels: beauty

  ¶ 8:11 PM 0 Comments

  Messy Thrilling Life -Sabrina Ward Harrison

Admitting today
I am a woman who wants to only weigh 123 pounds and sometimes thinks that could be the answer. I am a woman who likes her stomach flat and wants to seem like it doesn't matter all that much. I am a woman who wants to make powerful art of this world. I am a woman who can feel so lonely at the most unexpected times. and sometimes I cant ask directly or tell you how upset I really feel and I hope I'll grow out of it.

Girls seem very leggy in this city. Their legs go on and on. Where did they all come from?

I want to leave a dance. I want to let it rip I want to find new rooms inside myself. I dont want to write myself of as weak. I want to strengthen everything heart muscle.

I am a woman who wants to start fresh and most of the time I feel small when I take my boots off. I am a woman who needs her own role models and doesn't want to be one for anyone else. Maybe one that speaks up for the muted bag of human.

I want to be loved, but not changed to fit them. I want to live louder but not fele like a selfish person for doing so. I want to go crazy

I have always wanted to be brave. I wake up waiting.

crabby annoying bitchy lame pathetic mean snarly needy plain push wornout - parts of me I really don't like when they come out. We can't always be lovely and glowing.

I know I am always trying to come from love, and I don't all the time. I know I can be a pisser and really annoying. I know I can burst into tears at not the best times. I can listen I can give I can try my best. I know I can hurt people without meaning to, I know I can love deeply. I grapple with all this stuff. Don't we all a bit?

I want to leave traces of truth. Traces of what it actually feels like. What can be told true today? I apologize so often for myself. I catch myself carefully constructing my actions to "keep the love steady". The acceptance strong. The understanding in place. I want to give it up. Fall out of line and allow the way it goes.

Going to a bar with a guy can really suck. I hate being checked out by other women. there is supposed to be all this sisterhood but it seems to fly out of the window. It can be so fierce and intense. I try to remember we are all just trying to make our way through. We all get nervous and unsure about our place in all this. But in that bar feel naked and isolated surrounded by a swirling crowd of smiles and spilling alcohol.. and I play along.

I am here to be different to be full-grown and woman, not girl rattled with questions, but a woman ready to make new work and find new answers. I am a woman who puts on her future when she wakes up in his arms and decisions. I am a woman who wants to fall in love with her work the way men do. The way they put it first and me second.

I have to remember that it's okay (and normal + right) to not feel up for it all sometimes to feel let down by life thinking "This is it" what I've been striving for but it doesn't feel like the answer- or deep peace I thought would be there.

I carry with me stories of forgiveness and how much I've tried not to worry. I carry my worry and concern. I carry with me my phone and all the numbers of those I call and those who don't call back.
I carry with me every fresh new start. I don't carry the worry of your departure or your schedule in my mind. I don't carry your number anymore. I carry the desire to go unnoticed and at the same time not be forgotten. I carry the laughter. I carry the dream of you before I knew you and into the days to come. I want to believe there is a bigger plan and I need that is above me for my life, a way that I can trust my decisions and the way it seems to go.

In love I can lose myself along the road. I want to give him my care my time my concern my body but I have given out, lost the bottom of my oat. These women who hold their own- so strong and decisive blow me away. They make plans on Friday+Saturday nights with their girlfriends not concerned in the least for their man for keeping the connection, they go on waltzing forward taking care- strong care of themselves.

I don't want to be ruled by my expectations, wanting magic painless perfect love + romance. Filled with crazy love sick rolling and topping. I want him to fight for me.

Sometimes I just want to slosh around in my art making. Sometimes I want to be dainty and classy (and lovely) for my man. Sometimes I want to never look into the mirror. and give up the show. I wish I was low maintenance and low key. I wish I didn't hurt the kindest people and I wish I knew how to get angry.

He tells me he can do none of it now, none of what we feel we should be able to handle. There is so much that I don't know. and so many questions and I feel that crease in my brow as it sit here in the shade. And I think my best friend, my partner, my first ever, may leave in the flash of an eye- it seems it always could happen, anything can take us away. And with my fears I prepare for this loss in my heart. The heartbreaking loneliness.

I think of my own life for a moment. Where do I start from here? Where do I belong? do I head off? to follow? Time to get some perspective, look at my own life with room around the edges.

I want to give it up. Give up the competition the city thrives on. The standards are so high. What really rests at the top? I don’t like seeing myself in the mirror when I do. I look trashy when I do. I feel better in PJs and socks. Where can I go that is so simple anymore?

There is a terrible sadness I feel, a mourning of a certain sort of dream come true. Giving up on a sort of longing for a calm I thought I could hold and know was true and right and somehow lasting.

Sometimes I don't think I'll be a good mother. I won't be patient and selfless and loose. I worry how overwhelmed I will feel. How tired. I worry I will lose me and what I make. I do know deep down that making another human being is the most creative amazing thing-- but I still worry. But sometimes I feel like I can't be a wife. The fear of losing self, fading away nothing left for anyone else to love or need. How can we take care along the way? Restore, fill up, awaken. I wanna be a good mama.My mom seemed like she handled it so well. I admire the women who handle the balance.

I have done the best I can and I am giving everything I can think of, that I have to give to take my life in my own two hands and not apologize. To make my life matter, to take responsibility for what I do in my life. Take responsibility for speaking up for the ways I take care of my own body, the mistakes and successes. To stand away from the crowd and take the road less traveled.

I want to say I'm sorry for letting you down but I can't say sorry anymore. I can't I just can't. there will be no one left here.

In one life how many times can the heart break? When we do know we have found our true north? WHere do I belong? What happens next? How do I know if this is all wrong? How long will we live this way? What will my children be like? How long will I live? Where will I go?

Labels: book

  ¶ 9:07 AM 0 Comments

  I CAN MAKE YOU THIN- Paul McKENNA

Some really cool extracts:
"It's through your imagination that you actually make all your best decisions about what you are going to eat. When you read the menu in the restaurant, you mentally taste all the food in your mind before you decide what to have. Thats why restaurants go to such trouble to describe their food in appetizing terms. For example, which would you rather have for dinner: 'Goujons of sole lightly sautéed and served in delicate lemon sauce' or 'DEAD FISH'?"

"There are lots of people who are members of what I call the "clean plate club". UNless they finish everything put in front of them they believe they are somehow 'bad'. Eating everything on your plate whether you're still hungry or enjoying it or not is basically giving permission for your weight to be controlled by some kid who's being paid $4 an hour at McDonald's. Let's face it, you wouldn't let a shop assistant tell you how much to spend on clothes, would you?

Like most kids, I was told by my parents to eat everything on my plate because 'there are starving children in India'. Don't underestimate the subtle power of this guilt trip, especially if it was installed at a formative age. Eventually, of course, I realised that it was a con. I used to say, "how does me being overweight help the starving children? Shall I take a picture of myself fat and send it to them with a note saying, "At least you know the food isnt going to waste"?"

:D
The 4 Golden Rules!
1. Eat whenever you are hungry
2. Eat only what you want, never what you think you should.
3. Eat consciously and enjoy every mouthful
4. Stop when you even think your body is full

Labels: diet

  ¶ 7:43 PM 0 Comments

  Spilling Open - Sabrina Ward Harrison

If you're not yourself, who will be? Belong to yourself.

I have been feeling so blank and full of muted tones. I've been stuck in a muck.
Yesterday I got my haircut so short that when I went to school, Christopher said I looked like an english school boy. So that didn't help. My face feels wide and naked.
(...it just looked so good in the magazine.)

I catch myself trying to cover up the parts of myself that I don't accept. It's like a mask. I use my long black skirt to cover my legs that feel thick sometimes. I put make up on that attempts to look like. If I want to be accepted and loved as it is, without the 'extra attachments', why do I keep it up? It bewilders me.
Who do you wear a mask for today? I think masks say "approve me, accept me, love me."
So what am I without the masks? What am I from the inside out?
I had bad acne, I have scars.
I'm not slick at games involving balls, being thrown or kicked towards me.
I feel stumpy in sweat pants (especially ones with pockets)

So much of my growing up has been spent trying to figure out who I am and accept who I am and perhaps even love who I am. Unfortunately I have noticed that I spend a lot of time comparing myself to other young women my age, watching for traits they possess that I feel i lack. It's very exhausting. But i seem to keep comparing and desiring ('needing') more or wanting less. When do I stop and be the SABRINA the way I am? When do I top and believe that I am enough as I am? With all the parts of me that feel 'too small' or 'too lumpy' or 'too quiet'. Too too too too to.
I must ask myself "What am I trying to be that I already am?" If I don't love those parts of me, I think it will be a very sad journey. (and a pathetic waste of time)
If you're not yourself, who will be?

The truth is we all ache. We all have growing pains and wonder if we are okay and enough + loved. The thing is - we are. Really. We are enough without all the things we buy to make us much more than we are or need to be.

I learn and relearn that silence doesn't protect me. An unexpressed life is very painful to myself and those I love. Dont love halfway.
I am learning that loving all the way can ache and sting, but loving halfway doesn't keep me safe. It leaves me with sadness and a hope that could never live outloud.

Work like you don't need the money. Love like you've never been hurt. Dance like no one is watching. -Kathy Mattea

"I certainly do not hope to alter the world, perhaps I can put it best by saying I hope to alter my own vision of the world. I want to be more and more myself. as ridiculous as theat may sound." -Henry Miller

My friend Susan always reminds me that the ultimate goal is radical self-acceptance. Get into who you are. This is what inspired me so much about meeting the photographer- Elizabeth Sunday. She said, "I believe in my myself. I believe in my vision, my life, my talent, my art. More than anyone. No one can take that away from me."
I think when I can get to that place of self-acceptance and a sense of calm assurance in who I genuinely am- if I can believe in who I am, what I need, what I deserve, and what I must express. Then I can let go of the struggle of self-acceptance based on their approval of my beauty. Boobs, thighs, and sketchbooks. I will dare to do just what I want to do, be just what I am. and dance whenever I want to.

Loss and letting go of my ache. It can feel so dumb and pointless and so sad and real other times. I feel 1.shaky 2.red 3.worried 4.sore head 5.spinning eyes 6. sick with doubt 7. exhausted
I don't like how afraid my hands are to be empty.

I came home today from school venting very loudly in the car to myself. I feel so 'highly sensitive' and spun out and tired and hopeless and that feels scary! I feel tired of this drama with this boy at school. I want sincerity and I want brave loving I don't want to be making a logo or designing an annual report. I want to make books and take pictures and drink more tea. And lie on more couches and listen to Pablo Neruda poetry and read sark books and go to bed early and kiss more cheeks and play headsup7up when it rains and giggle more and drive less and dream of funny possibilities and brave endings.

A storm hit yesterday. The moon was so bright that it wouldn't let me sleep. The day has felt invisible like time couldn't make itself known. I want to twist away from this loneliness, there seems to be no place for it in this world around me. Where does everybody else put their sadness?

I get so mad at myself for 'caring so deeply' and maintaining all this stuff. and that feels so pathetic. I want to put my thinking in hibernation for a while.
Can't being just as I am be enough for me? I don't like doubting my 'me-ish-ness' because it's ALL i have. And I don't have time to keep searching to be someone else.
I want the wide hugs and the exclamations of delight.
When did I start doubting who I am? My friend Marguerite who is ten just can't comprehend not being herself. That's why she's so vibrantly alive and glorious.
Study to know yourself as you really are. I think we have a hard time making a commitment when we don't know who we are. So who am I? It seems to be easier to think of who I'm not.
I'm not Madonna or Superman.

I've been consumed with all this living up to something to 'be something'. Express something!
We have such a longing to be understood and loved by the other. Why? Can't it be just this now? Without armor and the shield. Just myself. My vulnerability protects me, not tight control. I hope to love with an open hand and a slow trusting stride.

There is a reason and there is a meaning You will know in ti me. But time itself will choose the moment. - Kent Nerburn

So when I just feel the loss and the sadness- I think,
why love if it hurts so much?
I try just a bit to soak in the goodness of feeling so deeply for another, the surrender, the joy, the tangled laughter in also in the pain felt.

Let yourself go.
I don't want to edit my living, my becoming who I am. It's like trying to fit into shoes that aren't mine. I've been feeling blocked and far too alone inside. All this holding back, clutching on.
All the silent thinking "Will he disappear?" "how long will it last?"
Maybe i'm such a romantic, wanting treasured moments.
I believe that loving fearlessly is the bravest thing in this world. It's not loving without fear. It's loving fearlessly, courageously [love truly] to be afraid and leap regardless. There is such power in that. I think that relates to all parts of living your life. I think what you felt unlived and unexpressed in love, hurts the most.

I wish to commit to grow younger, to let go of my fear as I learn about love . To allow all to be felt there is still so much newness and wonder to feel. Bless the not knowing. Telling my truth in love is like exposing the underside of my wings, we see that part only when we fly.

I thought alot today about limitless love. Most of the time I spend worrying about the people in my life who love me conditionally-with limits. Deciding when and how they will love me and how they will edit the love they will show me. The problem lies in how I then edit and limit the love I am showing and giving (for fear of not being loved in return) and that's not how I want to live in love.

OH this is what I need in love. Spinning in the sun and laughing, really really hard. I need desire and "AHHS" and I need to be told brave true words. I need myself. I need my voice. I need a partner who will giggle and cherish me to my bones. I need real, real genuine and I need strength I need loving gestures + lots of drawing on the floor. I need honest dinner time talking. I need to be met halfway I need to feel needed, surrender, feel understood. I need to not be mocked when I am being real. I need true kindness and love that glows brightly.

This weekend has felt so out of control. Lots of fears. Not good at loving. I'm not goodlooking. I'm not good at making stuff happen. I'm not good at articulating how I feel. ..not good at taking care of what I love. And with all these feelings come hopelessness. I feel like I'm drowning in feeling sorry for myself.

I want to stop sucking in, stop holding my breath, stop covering up. Let go. It isn't worth it. I can't think of one good reason to keep up the act of 'being moe than i need' If I can't love myself bare + freckled then 'he' certainly can't love me.
"I'm afraid to show you who I really am because if I show you who I really am, you might not like it - and that's all I've got."

Life is just too short to be so hard on ourselves.

"You are so young, you stand before beginnings. I would like to beg of you, dear friend, as well as I can to have patience with patience with everything that remains unsolved in your heart. Try to love the questions themselves like locked rooms. like books written in a foreign language. Do not now look for the answers. They cannot be given to you because you could not live them. It is a question of experiencing everything... you need to live the question, perhaps you will gradually without even noticing it, find yourself experiencing the answer some distant day." -Rainer Maria Rilke

I want to touch on all the sides of love- the hope, and gladness as well as the anxiety + ache. The biggest thing about love that I have discovered is that love is not just one way - there isn't just a point of perfection that makes it "all okay + great from now on". I am discovering that what I am needing to learn in love is gonna keep coming up Oh yes!
This morning I woke up from a very restless sleep with anxiety about replacement and I just exclaimed to myself "Haven't I learnt this yet? Haven't I learnt how to handle the feelings yet?" The answer is: Nope.

I am learning to write and speak of my true feelings for myself. That's how I can let go sooner of love fuller. It's a mixture of speaking up and speaking in. Reaching out and reaching in.

To experience being alive and being brought alive by another- something so beautiful and rare. It reminds me of that Henry Miller line... "I want to become more and more myself as ridiculous as that may sound." In love I become who I must understand.

I find myself comparing alot - thinking "OH I should be more like her," but when I let go of the world all around me and breathe into me as I am- I can love much more truly and completely when I can accept myself, I can accept the ones around me - and still be together enough as we are. and that the real part. all there is.

Why does it matter so much here? So much watching and feeling watched. trying too hard. Sometimes I go to the bathroom to look in the mirror just to make sure I'm still here. Get a grip my mind can take me so far away.

"There will always be more beautiful women- smarter women- more successful women. Always. So you must focus on what you are, not what you aren't.

I hold tightly to frightened hands. I make alot of mistakes. I tell my doubts. I laugh with my worries. I dance with little girls. I am frightened by truth sometimes- but I need it like my own blood.

I think God leaves me alone to let me find my own strength because no one else can give it to me for me. Sometimes it is very lonely- but I know the lonely times teach me the MOST. I must let go in order to let anything in. No one can love me for me. Take a big walk protected in the trees.

Knowing someone else's life is passing away makes me want to show up for living now- not 'then' when things are taken care of and the weather is warm. I have a chance to make a difference NOW. I have a chance to help heal some of my own broken places and hopefully someone elses. We must realize that what we do matters. Our love matters truly (that's why we are here.) Life is too short to be cruel, it is too short to suck-in, hold on, not forgive. We just don't have time.

We are not so different, only our circumstances are.

What I really want to say to myself is: it is alright. These anxious questions and doubts, answers and waiting, this is just as it is. Right now, taking me on my way- don't run. We all suffer. This is what I know to be true. There will be understanding sooner than you thinka nd later than you expected.

love it all. The fear, the excitement, the guilt, the power for chance, the unworthiness, the hurt feelings, the anger, the movement, the whole process, it's known as life.

Labels: book, self-help

  ¶ 12:28 AM 0 Comments

  Teen Beauty Secrets- Diane Irons

ATTITUDE
- Plan one thing that will help you improve physically, intellectually, emotionally, even spiritually.
- Be proud of who you are.
- Walking, eating, getting out of a chair, looks so much better when done in a way more deliberately.
- The way you sound & things you say- your voice has power. You can give your voice the same attitude you give to the rest of your body.
- At the end of the day, think of 3 things you did well.
- Nobody's perfect. Being the best you can be is more than enough.
- Learn to forgive yourself on a daily basis.

Labels: motivation, positivity, self-help

  ¶ 10:58 PM 0 Comments

  The Nervous Girl's guide to Nip & Tuck - Dr Patrick Bowler

Psychologists tell us that when we meet someone for the first time we zone in on the 'triangle' formed by their eyes and mouth to decide how attractive they are. It's all to do with the mating instinct. Our eyes form two corners of this triangle, so the more obvious they are, the more we are deemed to be. It's a cruel irony then, isn't it, that the area around our eyes is one of the first to give the game away when it comes to ageing.
The skin around our eyes is much thinner than the skin on other parts of our face, therefore it is the first part of our face to lose its stretchiness, and when it does those smiling/squinting lines stop pinging back and become permanent fixtures.

There is another facial triangle of attraction, apart from the one made by your mouth and eyes. The temples of the forehead are the upper corners and the cheeks guide the onlooker's eye down towards the third corner, which is the chin.

Things that affect how fast we age:
Skin type (parents)
Amount of sun (weather)
Smoke (stress levels)
Stress Levels (relationships/work)
Skin care routin (blame self)
What we eat/drink

EYES

Wrinkle around the eyes
Severity depends on your lifestyle. Also suspect heavy handedly applying eye makeup or removing contact lenses can contribute to these wrinkles- if you are repeatedly rough with this area you can overstretch the skin, making it lose its elasticity sooner.
Tips:
- Good skincare habits make a big difference. Wear shades whenever possible, put sunscreen!
- Dont rub too much when you remove makeup and be gentle when putting it on
- Moisturize the area with creams that contain glycolic acid, vitamin A & C and Idebenone. They help skin regenerate itself.
- Don't buy a separate product for eyes- 'eye creams' just a marketing gimmick. They are just milder strength versions of face cream, apart from those that contain abit of starch which stops the cream from spreading onto the eye rim.

UVA and UVB
Remember 'A' is for ageing, UVA rays are mostly responsible for your lines and wrinkles.
'B' for burning, they give sunburn. Can also cause skin cancer and age skin prematurely.

Dark circles
2 things make the skin here look darker. First, blood vessels and pigment gather in the groove beneath the eye, gets more obvious over the years as skin covering it gets thinner. Secondly, loose skin or fat moves downwards and gathers in a semicircular ridge, which casts a shadow, making the circles look worse.
Tip:
- Don't buy face creams that claim to treat dark circles- waste of money.
- Camouflage with concealer containing minerals titanium dioxide or zinc oxide. They are light-reflecting

Acne
More people are getting it and adult acne is increasingly common in women in their thirties and forties. We know hormones play a part but we don't know exactly how. The worst sufferers usually have thicker, greasier skin and the grease itself is of a heavy consistency. In a mind case of acne, the cell lining each skin pore tend to be bigger, forming narrower exits, so the pores are more easily blocked. When a few dead skin cells get stuck in the exit, causing a blockage, you get a blackhead or a whitehead. The only difference between those two is the blackhead has a bit of pigment in it- it is not dirt.

When a pore gets blocked and the warm, sealed, stagnant environment inside the pore makes these bacteria breed like wildfire, as they multiply you get a build-up of pus that swells the skin.

To squeeze or not?
If your spot is sore or red, don't pick it. What you see on the surface is the tip of the iceberg. Some may come out, but some may also go deeper in, causing a cyst which is worse.
If you have a non-infected blackhead or whitehead you can give it a bit of steam and use a blackhead extractor to squeeze out the blockage.

Treating a mild case of acne
- Exfoliate regularly to help prevent grease glands clogging.
- Avoid heavy creams as they can clog up glands more.
- Eat healthy balanced diet. Immune system will be more efficient.
- Benzoyl peroxide Kills bacteria by blasting it with oxygen. May make your skin abit dry and red and it doesn't penetrate deeply, but it can help to control the zits.
- Glycolic acid is anti-inflammatory so it will reduce redness and less noticeable.

Cellulite
Cellulite develops on thighs and buttocks. The present theory is that it is a circulatory problem. Slow blood flow leads to a build-up of toxins, water and retention of fat. This makes the fat cells bulge, which is what causes the dimpling in the skin.
Tips:
- Anything that increases the circulation might help: diet, exercise, mechanical treatments
- Liposuction does not treat cellulite. The cellulite is fat that is attached to the skin. Liposuction can only remove fat that is underneath the skin.

Moles, lumps, bumps & warts
Ways or removing things: shaving off (with a scalpel), cutting out, lasering off, freezing or cauterizing, depending on the position and size of bump. Cauterizing works best on smaller things like warts and skin tags and it is efficient cos its fast, sterile and heals quickly. Shaving is better than cutting of the bumps is in a place where the skin is very tight, making it difficult to bring the edges together for stitching. Stitches involve a bit more maintenance because they have to come out on day five, but if it is a bigger lump that needs fixing, stitches can achieve a neat hairline scar. All these require a small anaesthetic.
Tips:
- Use silicone gel patches for 2-3 months after surgery to reduce scarring, can be bought in a chemist
- Don't let anyone cut a mole on an area where the skin is tight, like the bridge of your nose, because the scar will definitely stretch.

TREATMENTS
Botox
Botox temporarily weakens the muscles that gather your skin into folds, making it crease-proof enough to prevent wrinkles becoming established. When injected, botox attaches itself into a target muscle. Once it wears off, usually after 4 months, the muscles regenerate and regain enough to start creasing up your skin again.

You should not have botox if you:
- are taking muscle relaxants
- have a muscle-weakening disorder
- pregnant
- breastfeeding
- have alcohol in your system; the injections are more likely to give you bruises

Side effects:
- about 10% say they get a headache within 24hr of injection
- Do not apply makeup for a few hours, avoid poking around the area you had the jab
- Maybe a teeny bruise around the prick, which take a week to disappear but easy to conceal

Tips:
If its the first time, ask your practitioner to give you the minimum they think you'll need. It is a good way to avoid giving you too much. It's better to have too little as it is easy to add more, but once it is in you can't take it out.
Women are more pain-sensitive when they have their period. Avoid this time.

Where on the body?
- Best for frown area, crow's feet, wrinkles at the top of the nose
- Neck; useful for vertical bands that go from jaw line to collarbone
- On the mouth to lessen nose-to-lip lines
- Irregular chin
- Excessive hand and underarm sweating
- Headaches

Facial chemical Peels
Peels are chemical potions that are painted on the skin in order to exfoliate it.

Glycolic acid, a naturally occurring acid from sugar cane, is a good example of gentle chemical peel. It 'unglues' the dead skin cells so they wipe off, revealing newer skin underneath that has a more even tone and texture because it has not been exposed to the elements.
Expect sun spots to fade and your skin to look more radiant. For a month the skin feels nice and moist to touch, and if you have them monthly for 6 months, the skin gets firmer because it is producing more collagen.

Tips:
- Before and after peels, use only products your doc recommends.
- Using Retin-A too soon after a peel can make your skin red.
- Mustn't sun yourself for at least 2 months after a peel.
- Toners are a waste of money- they don't do anything and those that contain alcohol can dry your skin or send it into oil-producing overdrive.

How they work?
The scrubs you buy in shops remove dead and flaky skin, making your complexion smoother and brighter. Peels work the same way but they go deeper, so you see more noticeable and longer-term improvement in complexion. The deeper you go the more layer of skin you remove and the bigger the improvement, however, the longer it takes for your skin to recover.

Endermology
Non-invasive method of treating diffused, localize or flabby cellulite. It has a hand-piece with two rollers on it that you roll up and down on the skin, while a sucker in between the rollers draws the skin up. It kneads the skin much more vigorously than a therapist would with his bare hands.
Works best on surface cellulite in younger people, not much on established cellulite in mature women where the cellulite is fixed; ie. lumpy and visible when all muscles are relaxed.
Need dedication to get results: involves twice weekly sessions for 6 weeks then maintenance every three months. A session of 45 min to massage the whole body, and need regular exercise and appropriate diet.

Where on the body?
All over, but more work done on buttock and thighs

Fillers
Act like a padding you place under the skin in small amounts using a needle.

Where on the body?
- lips and smoker's lines
- nose-to-lip lines
- secondary smile lines on cheek
- corners of mouth where they droop down
- frown lines and forehead
- crow's feet
- depressed scars
- hollow cheeks

Intense Pulsed Light(IPL)
They remove hair, particularly well on fairer skin and darker hairs. Can remove broken veins from the face, calm the redness of acne rosacea, fade sun spots and pigmentation brought about by sun damage, rejuvenate skin, making it firmer and stimulating the growth of new collagen.

Lotions & Potions

Top 6:
Glycolic acid: exfoliator and skin-smoother
Vitamin A: skin vitamin that rejuvenates
Vitamin C: antioxidant and skin lightener
Vitamin E: antioxidant- works well with other vitamins
Cozenyme Q10: moisturizer
Idebenone: very powerful antioxidant- improves wrinkles


Jargon and Ad-speak
Scientifically proven
Vague description designed to impress

Laboratory tested/Test done in vitro
Means on petri dishes or animals, definitely not on humans. Its not possible to say positive results in the lab = good results in humans!

Guaranteed results
Specific term not to be trusted

Look for:
Double-blind crossover trial
Indicates extremely thorough testing. usually Reliable

Radiofrequency Remodelling
Radiofrequency waves are long, so they can travel quite far into the skin, where they can heat things without damaging the surface.
It is a deep-heat sensation, but some have a cooler.

Where on the body?
- forehead lift
- around the eyes, top and bottom
- cheeks (good results)
- jowls, neck
- cellulite, loose skin
- batwings
- tummy

Labels: beauty

  ¶ 7:49 AM 0 Comments

  One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.

His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books.
I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.'

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him.
They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt.

His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him.
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.

As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.'
He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!' There was a big smile on his face.
It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived.
As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.

He said he had gone to private school before now.
I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.
He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends He said yes

We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends..
When we were seniors we began to think about college.
Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.

I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem.
He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship..
Kyle was valedictorian of our class.

I teased him all the time about being a nerd.
He had to prepare a speech for graduation.
I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak Graduation day, I saw Kyle.
He looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school.

He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.
He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days.
I could see that he was nervous about his speech.
So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!'
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled.
'Thanks,' he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began
'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your friends...
I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them.I am going to tell you a story.'

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile.
'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.'

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.
I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile.
Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions.
With one small gesture you can change a person's life.
For better or for worse.

God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way.
Look for God in others.

'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.'

There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow is a mystery.
Today is a gift.

Labels: appreciation, relationships, touching

  ¶ 6:20 AM 0 Comments

  It's a BREAKUP not a BREAKDOWN - Lisa Steadman

Preface/Introduction
By the time all was said and done, I was a big fat screaming mess. I cried myself to sleep every night. Actually, I cried when I woke up in the morning, cried when I took a shower, cried on my way to work, cried in the bathroom at work, cried to my girlfriends on the phone, cried on the way home from work, cried on my couch at night, and then cried myself to sleep.
Today you may be feeling empowered and healthy about your breakup. Or you may be filled with doubt, despair, and confusion Don't worry, during your post-breakup recovery you'll most likely feel like you're on an emotional roller coaster. You'll go back and forth many times between the two extremes before you fully move on. Just ride it out, trust that you will get through this and become stronger for doing so. Your heart may feel like it's been shattered into a trillion tiny pieces, but it's still there. Still beating. It still loves you, and still believes in love. (Just need a little time to heal first.)

Breakup Rule #1.
You cannot sleep with your ex. I know how tempting it is to fall back into the arms of your ex. There's momentary comfort there.
Breaup Rule #2.
Avoid any contact with him at all, including calling, texting, emailing, checking his MySpace page, IM, driving by his house, showing up at his work, or leaving notes in his car. You cannot move on if you're still holding on.

EX ETTIQUETE
It's not possible to stay friends with an ex while still moving on. Because as hard as it is to accept, the relationship is over. It ended for a reason. Most who try to stay friends with their ex are just doing so in hopes of either rekindling or using the person as a crutch til someone better comes along.

Breakup Rule #3.
Do NOT save phone messages from your ex and replay them over and over again. That's self-destructive and will only hurt your ability to let go and move on.
There are plenty of available men who would love to call you. It's up to you to clear the way for them, and that means letting go of your ex, giving yourself time to heal, and then making space for someone new in your life.

And if you were hoping to keep tabs on your ex by tracking his every online move or possible new dating adventures via MySpace page? Don't. It'll just make you wonder who he's talking to (or obsess about those girls who keep posting messages to him), and you don't need that. Remove his page from your favourites and look for a new friend or two to take his place.


CHAP 2.
The Emotional Rollercoaster
There may be moments when you feel manic elation about your sudden freedom from a relationship that just wasn't working anymore. You may be prone to fits of laughter followed by a torrent of tears. Moments later, you might experience strong surges of panic, isolation, loneliness, and despair. Don't worry, you're not crazy, just post-breakup.

Why your ex isn't worth pining over
- He's not right for you.
- Someone else is out there, and you're free to look for him.
- You deserve to feel loved and wanted.
- He's probably not pining over you (harsh, but probably true)

Erase "If only" from your vocabulary.
It's only natural for us to look back on our relationship and wonder if there's anything we could have done differently.

Chap 3.
www.breakupchronicles.com
www.womensavers.com
www.breakupnews.com
www.dontdatehimgirl.com

Assess your Fabulous Factor
Write down 10 magnificent things about you. This is to remind you of your fabulous factor whenever you're in doubt.

And write down a list of things to do.

Chap 4.
If you still harbor feelings for your ex or you have moments when you miss him, you're perfectly normal.
Write down the things you're not gonna miss about. Eg. his mood swings? money problems? Take a good look and remember why it's good he's gone.

Reasons why you might not want to let go.
You still Love him
Plain and simple, you're still in love with your ex. The good news is you'll definitely find love again, with the right guy, your heart will be in good hands.

You're not sure it's really over
You tend to linger too long at the breakup scene. This only leads to more questions. The best thing to do is accept that not all your questions will be answered and move on anyway.

Worried no one else will come along
Pessimists tend to settle for less than they deserve because they haven't fully discovered their own magnificence. They gravitate toward relationships with people they think can help or make them happy. but the only person is actually yourself.

MOVING ON
- I will never give my heart to anyone who is undeserving of it.
- I will pay attention to relationship red flags as they are revealed to me and act accordingly.
- When I'm ready, I trust myself to exercise excellent judgment in selecting a suitable candidate to fall in love with (one who is capable of loving me on the same level!)
- I trust myself to date and be open to the possibilities.
- I am healthy and strong enough to endure dating disappointments along the way, and I will be able to differentiate those from the actual heartbreak.
- I will not let any baggage from the past affect my future relationships.
- I dedicate myself to wholeheartedly to living and loving my life as it is right now (fixing the things that no longer work and love my life even more)

Labels: bgr, book, self-help

  ¶ 6:58 PM 1 Comments

  Law of Attraction -Michael J. Losier

I attract to my life whatever I give my attention, energy and focus to, whether positive or negative.
1. You observe what you receive and have in your life (whether positive or negative)
2. While observing, you send a vibration, either positive or negative.
3. The Law of Attraction responds to the vibration you are sending.
4. As a result, you get more of what you were vibrating, whether positive or negative.

Whether it's a positive or negative vibration, the Law of Attraction will give you more of the same.
words -> thoughts (made up of words) -> feelings (positive/negative vibrations)

Words that are causing you to attract what you DON'T want:
Your unconscious and conscious mind automatically filters out the words don't, not, and no. When you use these words you are actually internalizing in your mind the exact thing you are being told not to. When you make a statement using the words don't, not or no, you are actually giving attention and energy to what you don't want. Each time you do that, ask yourself "So, what do I want?" When you ask yourself what you DO want, the answer will have created a new sentence with new words. When your words change, your vibration changes.

You can only send out one vibration at a time.
You can reset your vibration simply by changing your words, remembering that thoughts are made up of words.

www.LawofAttractionBook.com/worksheets.html

The 3 step formula for Deliberate Attraction
1. Identify your desire.
2. Give your desire Attention
Contrast, is anything you don't like, doesn't feel good, or causes you to be in negative mood. The moment you identify something in your life that feels like contrast and you spend time complaining about it, you offer a negative vibration.
Observing contrast is essential because it helps you to become clearer about what you do want.
3. Allow it

Complete your own Clarity through Contrast
Choose an area in your life you would like to change.
On side A list all the things that are troubling you about your situation.
On side B, ask yourself "So, what do I want?"
By doing this you have a better understanding of what you want (clarity of desire) by listing what you don't want (contrast).

Here's what we covered.
- Your words generate a vibration that is either positive or negative.
- When you use the words don't, not, and no, you continue to give more attention, energy and focus to what you are referring to. Instead ask "So what do I want?"
- Use contrast briefly knowing that the Law of Attraction is always responding to your vibration
- Use contrast to generate clarity
- When building your contrast list find as many contrast items as possible. The more contrast you identify, the more clarity you'll have.

Give your Desire Attention
Imagine you have a bubble that is surrounding you and captured within this bubble are all the vibrations you are sending out. The Law of Attraction is responding to whatever is inside your Vibrational Bubble.

Am I including it in my vibrational bubble?
- When I'm talking about what I desire
- When I'm noticing something I like
- When I'm daydreaming about my desire
- When I visualize my desire
- When I'm pretending I already have my desire
- When I say yes/no to something
- When I worry about something
- When I complain about something
- When I remember something positive/negative
- When I'm observing something positive/negative
- When I'm playing with the idea of my desire
- When I'm making a collage about my desire
- When I'm praying about my desire
- When I'm celebrating something I like

Why using affirmations may not raise your vibration
An affirmation is a statement spoken in the present tense used to declare a desire. Attraction responds to the vibrations you send out based on how you feel, not based on specific words you use. If you tell yourself you have a slender body when you do not, or when it feels unattainable, you create a negative vibration (doubt) which the Law of Attraction will respond by giving you more of the same, even though it's unwanted. So reword it.

Tool #1: Rewording your Affirmations to make them Feel Better
Say instead.
I'm in the process of...
- I'm in the process of creating ideal family relationships
- I'm in the process of enjoying my body more and more
- I'm in the process of becoming more abundant
- I'm in the process of growing my business
- I'm in the process of having ideal health
- I'm in the process of attracting an ideal mate

Now each statement is true for you! When its true you feel good. When it feels good you are sending a positive vibration which the Law of attraction responds by bringing you more of the same.

Tool #2: The Desire Statement Tool
The three elements to the Desire Statement:
- The opening sentence
- The body
- The closing sentence.

Desire statement-
OPENING SENTENCE:
I'm in the process of.. attracting all that I need to do, know, or have, to attract my ideal mate.

BODY:
I love knowing that my ideal ______________
I love how it feels when _________
I've decided __________
More and more _____________
It excites me _____________
I love the idea of _______
I'm excited at the thought of _________
I love seeing myself ___________

The above phrases allow you to talk about your desire and at the same time knowing it's true for you.

CLOSING SENTENCE:
The Law of Attraction is unfolding and orchestrating all that needs to happen to bring me to my desire.

How do I know I'm doing it right?
Do you hear a little negative or uncomfortable feeling? Does your desire make you feel great? If not, then revise your statement so that you feel better (raise your vibration) when you read it.

Step 3: Allowing It
It is simply the absence of negative vibration(doubt). Have a strong desire with no doubt means your desire will be manifested quickly.
The speed at which Law of Attraction manifests your desire is in direct proportion to how much you Allow.

What is a Limiting Belief?
It is a repetitive thought that you think over and over again. When your thoughts consist of a limiting belief you're offering/sending out a negative vibration that will prevent you from attracting your desire.
It is "I can't.. because.."

Two Ways to know You've Allowed
First you can tell by how you feel. When you remove a negative feeling of resistance, most people feel a sense of relief or hear themselves saying, "Ah this feels much better!"

Secondly you can notice when manifestation appears in your life. When evidence is showing up in your life, you know you are allowing.

Belief #1: I'd like to have a more slender body but I can't because my family members are big.
Q: Is there anyone on the planet who has a body size different from their family?
A: Yes
Q: IF so, how many people have been doing this today? Yesterday? Last week, month, year?
Allowing statement:
Thousands of people, even in my neighbourhood, have different body sizes than their family members. There are millions of men on the planet that have a more slender body than their father or brother.

More tools to help you Allow
1. Celebrate the Proof (evidence)
The best way to remove doubt is find proof.
Have you noticed when something you desire starts showing up in your life, even just a little bit, it excites you? All this is proof of the Law of Attraction at work in your life.

2. Record Proof of the Law of Attraction
Keeping a diary or a book will help you believe it more, get excited more, allow moe and trust more. Regardless of the size, record the proof and it will raise your vibration. Remember, it is the absence of doubt that will bring your desire faster.

3. Appreciation and Gratitude
When you take time to appreciate every day you intentionally offer strong, positive vibrations, including those in your Vibrational Bubble.
Remember, the Law of Attraction does not care whether you are remembering, pretending, playing, creating, complaining or worrying. It simply responds to what's in your bubble, so find proof and send out a positive vibration.

4. Use the expression, "I'm in the process of..."
When you concentrate on what you don't have, you offer a negative vibration, so instead, reword it.

5. Use the expression, "I've decided..."
Have you noticed that in most cases when you say "I've decided" it creates a strong positive emotion? Most people rarely use the word DECIDE, yet it is an excellent way to take your focus off of lack and put it back onto your desire.

Decide more often, you'll feel instant relief from the positive emotions that come with each act of deciding.

6. Use the expression, "Lots can happen..."
Using this Allowing phrase shifts your vibration from lack to abundance, or from a negative to a positive one.
From now on, the moment you notice a lack of results, focus on the possibility that "lots can happen."

7. Ask for Information
We have less resistance to accepting information and as a result information comes quickly because there is no negative vibration to stop it from coming.

8. Make yourself an Attraction Box
Keep an attraction box to collect things that represent your desire: cut out from magazines, brochures for trips you want to take, or even business cards of people you want to work with.

Each time you put something in, you offer 'vibrationally' is hope, and hope is positive vibration.

9. Create a Void or Vacuum
A void or vacuum is always waiting to be filled.

E.G. you're looking for more clients. By labelling some empty file folders with "next new client" it sets the intention that you want to attract new clients and also creates a void to be filled. Saying "I am waiting for new clients" can be rephrased as "I have room and space for new clients." Does it feel better? :)

Some voids can be created intentionally. E.G. enter on your calendar "New appointment goes here" now you create a void to attract those things, giving it more attention, energy and focus.
Other kind is unintentional. When a client cancels, don't complain and give it a negative attention. Instead, say "I've created a void to attract a new client!"
Now that's allowing!!

10. Allow the Law of Attraction to figure it out
When you catch yourself saying "I don't know, I can't"....
STOP! Say to yourself, I'm going to allow the law of attraction to figure it out. There comes a time when you need to take action.
As you let the law of attraction figure it out, and you start to receive things that are in alignment with your desire, you can then decide to take action.

Wrapping up
- Allowing is the absence of doubt
- The negative vibration of a doubt cancels the positive vibration of a desire
- Finding proof removes doubt

Relationships and your Vibration
The next time someone calls you and starts to talk about how negative their life is... you do not buy into that conversation which lowers your vibration to match theirs. Instead: ask them simply, "So, what do you want?"
As their vibrations rises it gets closer to matching yours, the more harmonious your vibrations become.

Labels: book, motivation, positivity, self-help

  ¶ 6:21 AM 0 Comments